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Hold Space
Get skilled up for Holding Space at work, at home, and in between!
If you are not the Spaceholder... who is?
Two Spaces
Two Spaces -
When you establish yourself in the Adult ego state, you might discover that there are two kinds of space that you are dealing with. One is the common ordinary Physical Space, defined by walls, floor, ceiling, furniture, decorations, sounds, smells and so on. Before now, when you think of the concept of “space,” physical space is all that you would normally think of.
The second kind of space is Energetic Space, defined by attention, intention, quality, tone, mood, purpose, timing, speed, direction, and so on.
The Physical Space is solid and relatively permanent, serving fixed Purposes. Its shape and Purpose will not change unless there is an earthquake, it is remodeled, etc.
The Energetic Space is mobile and flexible. It has the capacity to change shape, Purpose, direction and speed almost instantaneously.
An Energetic Space can have the same dimensions as the surrounding physical space. An Energetic Space can also have larger or smaller dimensions than the Physical Space. For example, the Space of a conversation between two people in a noisy restaurant is smaller than the Physical Space of the whole restaurant. The Space of the conversation might be a small amorphous bubble enclosing only the two people, making them oblivious to the general noise in the restaurant as a whole.
Energetic Space
You are either conscious of these two kinds of spaces or you are not.
If you are not conscious that you are, in each moment of every day, involved in both Physical Spaces and subtle Energetic Spaces, it does not make you immune to the effect of the qualities of Energetic Spaces. You are affected. But, without energetic space-holding skills, you are powerless to create any difference in what is going on. Simply by adopting the new thoughtmap that there is physical space, and right along with it, perhaps even with the same physical dimensions, an Energetic Space, you gain the Possibility of making changes that were previously too subtle and out of our reach.
When you extend your responsibility to include Energetic Spaces, you gain the Possibility of Navigating Energetic Spaces.
The skills needed for Navigating Energetic Space are not much different from driving a car or playing a video game. By Navigating Space, you choose which direction the space goes, or when and how to leave one Space and enter another Space. Further details about Navigating Space are the contents of another website: Navigating Space.
QUESTION: If you cannot clearly create and clearly Hold Space, what good will it do you to try to jump ahead and try to learn to Navigate Space? You can only go through a Doorway when you are at the Doorway. The wise suggestion is to start where you are and become a specialist in creating and Holding Space before you try to start investigating how to Navigate Space. Let this be a warning to you.
'Holding Space' means taking Radical Responsibility at the level of Energetic Space.
The first step in taking Radical Responsibility at the level of Energetic Space is to Experience the qualities of the Energetic Space.
Adopt the new thought-map that there is Physical Space, and right along with it, an Energetic Space.
Keep distinguishing the two kinds of Spaces when moving from one physical space to another.
You can already do this. Have you ever walked into a room talking loudly on your phone and you realized that someone was taking a nap on the couch? What might you do then? You slow down, start whispering on the phone, maybe walk on the tip of your toes and get out of there before continuing your phone call. The Physical Space did not inform you that it is a sleeping space. The Energetic Space informed you. The person napping has declared the Energetic Space as a 'sleeping space' which makes it a silent, slow and undisturbed space.
It is the same for churches, movie theaters, museums, banks, libraries, basketball court, grocery stores, cafés, or the Post Office. Each of those Physical Spaces have their particular Energetic Space and you can refine your Attention and your Noticing to feel it when you walk into them.
In the same way you take some level of responsibility for the Physical Space, for example by cleaning the bathroom, vacuuming the floors, taking out the garbage, washing the dishes, etc..., your Practice as a Spaceholder is to take more conscious responsibility for the state of the Energetic Space. You do this by detecting:
- the limits of the energetic space. For example, in the attached image, the people did not include the cat in their energetic space. If a cat is in an energetic space or a child, the space changes into a pet or child space.
- the Purpose: responsible or irresponsible.
- the state: Ordinary or Extraordinary or Archetypal.
- the speed: faster of slower than the Speed Of Love.
- the quality.
- the power: who is Flowing or not Flowing Power to who?
- the direction: what is the outcome of this space?
- the duration.
With this Thoughtware Upgrade, you gain the Possibility of making changes that were previously too subtle and out of reach to make. This is where Healing, Initiation, and Transformation begin.
Holding Space as a Couple in the Kitchen.
(You think you can hold space for a cat?)
A Story...
... about Holding Space by Clinton Callahan.
1Chapter 1
When I first started learning about holding space I thought holding space meant controlling the space. I became a fanatic for details. I would grip a space so tightly that I would not let anybody move or create anything at all. In that way the space would not get out of my control. But, after awhile, I started noticing that nothing happened in such a petrified space. It was cold, dead, and stiff with rigor mortis. Somehow I had to loosen up and still hold space at the same time. I had to relax and find some way to allow movement without taking my hands off the wheel.
2Chapter 2
About six months later I found that I could fill a space knee-deep with a kind of energetic mud, a sleepiness from the waist down induced by my own fear of chaos. People were permitted to think and talk but they were strictly not allowed to feel or take any surprising actions. I thought I had found the solution to holding space because there was a greater freedom of movement and yet the space would not be out of my control. Unfortunately the movements were tedious and inauthentic, like trying to dance while carrying a bag of cement. There was no real aliveness, nonlinearity or flow.
3Chapter 3
During the next six months I experimented with letting myself be more and more afraid and still staying functional. I was terrified of the freedom I gave people to create anything they were moved to create in each next moment while I still retained responsibility for what happened. Me being afraid but not paralyzed permitted the others to safely erupt with joyous nonlinear creation. Far deeper conversations and interactions could take place than I had ever before suspected. My fear became an ally that gave me a sensitivity to more and more influences. I discovered that spaces had wings like an airplane and if I could permit a space to zoom fast enough along the ground I could pull back on the “steering wheel” with my attention and we could lift off into completely unsuspected angles and dimensions, using both Bright and Shadow Principles as fuel for accomplishing the creative tasks set before the group.
4Chapter 4
The next level of space holding came as a major Box-expansion for me. The expansion occurred when I allowed the Clinton-personality-Box who was holding the space to be replaced by a more expanded set of possibilities, namely, the space-holder-Box. As the specific tendencies of the “Clinton show” relaxed, a more neutral space holder took its place. This not-pre-programmed space holder could shift character according to what was wanted and needed, and in various circumstances could be the father, the man, the husband, the sexual partner, the friend, the enemy, the whining victim, the trainer, the clown, the research scientist, the meeting leader, the artist, the theater performer, or others. The space holder was no longer representing the usual “Clinton” channels with habits and restrictions that I knew. Instead, I created and held a space through which the Principles that I served could do their work, and I was continuously surprised – sometimes even shocked – by the words, attitudes, speech patterns, behavior strategies, opinions and expanded character traits that I exhibited. I shifted from controlling the energetics of a space to navigating the energetics of a space because I was moved by a different purpose. No longer was it “Clinton’s” purpose; it was the purpose of the Principles. Suddenly, the relationships I was in and the projects I was doing became far more freed up, interesting and productive than before.
Et voila!
The End.
Well...
... More of a Beginning.
Spaceholding
THE SPACE DETERMINES WHAT IS POSSIBLE
What is crucial for you to know right now is that what happens and what is possible in each conversation or each moment in your Relating does not happen or become possible by 'accident'. It happens or becomes possible according to what Space you are Consciously or Unconsciously Holding. The quality of the Space is the determining factor.
In other words: The Space determines what is Possible.
If what is happening right now does not match what you want or need in your relationship, you can simply stay in contact with your partner or with whoever is in the space, then lean your shoulder up against the wall of the space and direct your attention so as to make an energetic sucking gesture. Suddenly you will be in the next space, and whoever was in contact with you will be in the new space with you.
In other words: Every Space is connected to every other Space.
Since every Space is connected to every other space, you can get to anywhere from here.
DETAILS FOR SPACEHOLDING
- I begin in First Position by doing exactly what I am involved in giving instructions how to do.
- I am Intentionally Holding energetic Space from 8 points.
- I am Present in a very small NOW. Here. NOW. Sitting. Seeing. Hearing. Feeling. Being Present in all 5 Bodies.
- I have Grounded the Space and cleansed it.
- I have refilled the Space with a huge ball of gold colored energy and information.
- I have refilled the Space with the map.
- I declare that who I am is a Mage.
- I stand as Archetypal Love. This is what I am made of.
- I am Committed to creating Possibility for myself and others.
- I already have everything that I need.
- I feel scared and so I know that I have the possibility of Creation.
- I have a Sword Of Clarity which I use to make distinctions and boundaries and create clarity.
- I have a Voice Blaster which I use to blow away voices in my head.
- I have a magic Wand Of Declaration which focuses my attention with the question, "What am I creating?" If I know what I am creating, then I know what others are creating. If I stop fooling myself, then I cannot be fooled by others.
- I stand as Radical Responsibility. This is not fair, but it is what makes the space safe.
- I am at source. Therefore, I am the map. I am where I am, and I know where I want to go.
- I am not a victim.
- I am in contact with everyone, directly, individually. Therefore I know where they are.
- We are bonded. I include everyone. This does not mean that they will be able to go everywhere that I go. It means that even if I go somewhere they are unwilling to go, we are still in relationship. They are still included. They are not excluded. They are not wrong.
- And then I talk.
- We are always already going somewhere. Most of the time we are not conscious of where it is we are going. So, I speak consciously. I speak with Intention. I speak being aware of what it is that I am Creating. And because we are in contact, if I am aware of where we are, everyone else can become aware of where we are. They can be Present. I invite them into Presence in a minimized NOW. There we can all be present together.
- I do not know what I will say next. It is not a plan. I have a rough outline in front of me, and I do need to refer to it as a kind of check list. Where I want to go, it is required that we as a group carry with us in our Beings certain things that we have understood viscerally. So we work to pick those things up by creating/encountering them along the way. It is not too different from a video game looking for treasures, skills, tools, and talismans, except that things are not seen with these eyes. They are seen with your Energetic Body's eyes. They are sensed by the body, 'seen' by the body as a whole.
- I know where we need to go and I keep pointing out things to Notice until people get them. I am extraordinarily patient, except with Box and Gremlin, where I am intolerant, in a sly inarguable way. I will not play Box or Gremlin games. I will not battle Gremlin on Gremlin's terms because as soon as I engage the contest, Gremlin wins.
- I am leading. But I do not necessarily go there first. If someone else arrives there first I simply put attention there and we are there with them. I don't go where we don't want to go.
- I know where I go because I have been there before. I am bringing others with me. I am giving it to them. If they do not get it along the way, I cannot go further. I am not invested in us actually getting anywhere. I already have everything that I need.
- I will not engage the intellect, and yet it is safe for intellect. I move non-linearly. When we are stuck in a Doorless chamber, we go waterfall, we go key-lime pie, we go Ender's Game, we go Beethoven's 7th, we go dust balls. Keep the space rolling.
- When we are stuck in a Doorless chamber, I make sure that everyone knows that we are stuck in a Doorless chamber, I make sure I am in solid contact with everyone - I check in to make sure everyone trusts the connection - and then, very gently, I lean my shoulder up against a wall and easefully fall right through into the next chamber. Without even knowing, everyone comes right along with me into the next space.
- I move by holding a question. A question is an "electrical" charge that is distinct from the background environment. A question is a quest "ion". The charge either attracts the answer to me, or me to the answer. In either case, if I get an answer, I have moved into a new and more useful space. The purpose of a question is not to get an answer, but rather to get a better question.
- I am careful to note the source of a question. I use discernment. One ego question and a chamber is destroyed.
- I pay attention to details - but not from my mind. I let the space guide me with what it offers. I do not struggle. I am yes.
- I agree with the primate. I do not confront it.
- I am patient. One sudden move, one badly timed question and untold possibilities are made inaccessible forever.
- I assume that everything is my fault. If it is controlled it cannot live. I am vulnerable confidence.
- I protect the space from wandering entities who are hungry to feed off of something as juicy as this. I "as is" them by saying "Hello" to them at a distance as soon as I detect them. There is no conversation. We do not want any 'help' from them.
- It takes many organs to build an Angel.
- It is better to have and include the denying force as an internal organ in the group rather than to have it appear from outside of the group in the form of frightened neighbors, frightened police, hurricanes, tornadoes, etc.
- The center of the labyrinth needs only a moment. Trying to stay in the center of the labyrinth is like wanting to eat only candy, trying to live on top of Mount Everest, begging for orgasm to never end, always wanting a beautiful sunset. Forget about it.
EVERY SPACE IS CONNECTED TO EVERY OTHER SPACE
You already had the experience of this. You were having breakfast with your loved ones and everything was just fine. The orange juice was freshly pressed, the coffee warm and your partner next to you... and in less than 3 seconds, you are arguing about your mother or his mother. The previous space of 'nice breakfast' is long gone before you even notice where you are.
This is because every space is connected to every other space. We most often move from one space to another unconsciously. By doing so unconsciously, you serve Shadow Principles.
You can now practice using the skill of shifting space consciously - serving Bright Principles. This means you can go anywhere from here!
What is in the Gap between Spaces? Nothing.
It is the same Nothingness that is in the Gap between ALL Spaces.
You can enter the Nothingness in the Gap outside of one space and in the same moment exit the Nothingness in the Gap outside of another Space, and then you can enter that new Space.
Read and do the experiments of SPARK 26 - Each space is connected to every other space.
SPACEHOLDING IS BEING VULNERABLE
There is this concept, from modern culture, that being vulnerable is being weak, and it that state that you have to protect yourself from the world by retreating or withholding.
The best Training spaces are delivered when you are at your most vulnerable. Because when you am in a state of vulnerability, two things happen:
First, your solidity, your identification to your show has fallen apart. There is space for your Being, your Voice, your Feelings, your Archetypal Lineage and Bright Principles to come through. It might not seem clear or 'powerful', but it is when you can be the most connected with people. Their defendedness falls apart along with mine. Transformation can happen.
At the same time, the more vulnerable you are, the less tolerance to bullshit you will have. Because the bullshit 'hurts', it is like a knife in your Being, or in Gaia, or in Life. The Bullshit destroys intimacy, and your vulnerable Being wants intimacy.
Being a spaceholder is becoming someone who can have this and that: being in a vulnerable state and learn to hold space for Clarity and Transformation.
This would involve changing your story about your state of vulnerability. The new story would be something along the line of: "when I am vulnerable, my Presence comes through, both my heart and my sword. Being a spaceholder is being vulnerable."
Being in Liquid State can become your home, a state where you have much more freedom of movement to discover who you are Being then when you have certainty from an identification.
This is often the most difficult step in shift from being a consumer to being a spaceholder.
Videos
To give some context, I have recently heard people use the phrase "Good Possibilitator" and "Robot Spaceholder" to describe a way that they are applying their adaptive survival strategy to being in the Gameworld of Possibility Management. When I hear "Good Possibilitator," what I get that people mean is that they have turned living distinctions into dead, dogmatic rules to senselessly follow, and if they do not follow these rules, they are being "Bad Possibilitators." When I hear about "Robotism," what I get is that people are adapting the way they speak, hold space, and navigate to how they have seen it done before rather than locating and cultivating their own impulses.
Almost every time I have heard people talk about "Good Possibilitator" or "Robotism," it is in a Gremlin-victim way, the undertone being something like: "Possibility Management has turned this person into a parroting Robot," or "Possibility Management says I'm not allowed to be a victim, because then I'm not being a 'Good Possibilitator.'"
In the space, I was very clear that this was not a Gremlin conversation. What I held space for was:
1. For people to face into the adaptive survival strategy they brought with them into their Possibility Management work that had them turn their spaceholding into Robotism.
2. The possibility of navigating out of their adaptive survival strategy and into moving from non-survival-strategy-based (not Gremlin, Box, Child Ego State, etc.) impulses.
I had a plan and potential practices that I wrote out prior to the WorkTalk, but I almost immediately scrapped them. Very quickly, the WorkTalk came to life with people putting their own Robot Spaceholding and Inauthenticity in spaceholding on the table. Then, we shifted into a practice that emerged from the necessity of the space: Each person got 4 minutes to practice spaceholding for the group, and got instant feedback on how they shifted into inauthenticity as spaceholders. Some of these were about how they changed their voice, how they created a subtle hierarchy, how they blocked themselves from really being there, and even who they had adapted these things from (one woman said that she became her father as a spaceholder—stoic, certain what to do next, dead, etc.).
Spaceholding Skills
REMAIN CENTERED
Part 1: Visit a Low Risk Person.
Part 2: Visit a Medium Risk Person.
Part 3: Visit a High Risk Person.
Each one of those you make a proposal and keep your Center.
The point is that as a Spaceholder you will be making Collaborative Proposals and Transformational Proposals to keep your Center while you make your Proposal. Each time you lose your Center ask for feedback and coaching from the person, "How did I lose my Center just now?" Combine these two skills together.
REMAIN GROUNDED
In a mostly silent space, café, library, movie theatre. Where people are seated. Click your clicker for the 8 points of the space you are holding. The experiment here is to add one more click and to ground the space. Make a 30 centimetre black grounding cord from the middle of the floor of the space to the middle of the earth and split your attention so you can participate in what is happening in the space and keep part of your attention the whole time to keep the grounding cord. Every time you forget about the grounding cord you put a euro on the table and give it as a tip or buy a book for people.
REMAIN BUBBLED
Hold Space for your personal Bubble of culture. For an entire day, pick Christmas, or Halloween, or Black Friday and for an entire day, your only job is to keep your personal bubble of culture whoever you're talking to. It might help to consider it being like an alien dropped on earth trying to discover how ordinary human beings live their life. You can speak the language. Without losing integrity of your own culture, stay in connection and mostly be in this authentic curiosity about their life and the way they go about things. Try to go deeper and listen to actually why. Why is it like that. Prague at Christmas - why do you eat fried fish and potato salad? Have postcards. Most people that you talk to, give them postcards that say "you can build your own culture." or "learn culture to culture conversation". Partway through the experiment, shift identity into their culture for a little while.
BRING YOUR FOUR FEELINGS INTO PLAY
Create and hold a 4 feelings clarity space. Link to Your Teams. At the next Team meeting, ask to have control of the spaceholding for the next 30 minutes. Use your clicker, make sure that there are 8 points to the space, call in Bright Principles. Set the context without using the old and new map of feelings. By speaking, create the clarity in the space where people will be prepared to do a low level I feel mad sad glad scared low level feelings sharing experiment. After that, ask 3 people to tell you how it was for them, to share about low level feelings with somebody. Write down what they say as the proof for having completed this experiment.
BRING YOUR FOUR EMOTIONS INTO PLAY
Same experiment as the 4 feelings, but use the distinction of feelings vs emotions. In a meeting, give enough distinction. Break out in groups of 3. Explain the 4 sources. People at least list in this meeting, they've had at least one emotion from each of the sources. They have to track the emotions. I've had a child emotion when this happened. I had a parent emotion when this happened and I felt mad sad glad or scared. Demon is finding Trigger Sentences. My Gremlin wanted to compete. Ask for sharing at the end and report with one of the feedbacks of a person from your Team.
LIVE IN THE ALIVENESS OF YOUR SWORD OF CLARITY
Use your Sword Of Clarity for Holding Space. At a Team meeting, or with your 3Cell. Do the same experiment twice, once when you're consciously and Intentionally Holding Space, once where somebody else is Holding Space. Do this in group of 3.
First part:
One person Holds the Space (the Possibilitator) and as they're setting up, they say who's space it is, what the Purpose of the Space is, what the Bright Principles are, what's the territory that the Space can navigate into, what would be the results of the Navigation in the space. They say all that.
Part 2:
Same person is a participant. Ask the Possibilitator questions. How big is the space. What is the outcome of the space. Where is the Gremlin in the space? The point being that if the space is not consciously Held and serving conscious purposes, then it's unconsciously held and serving unconscious purpose.
TRANSFORM YOUR GREMLIN TO MAKE HIM/HER CONSCIOUSLY USEFUL TO THE SPACE
Your Gremlin is part of your childhood Survival Strategy. He / She is the active Part of your Box. It is the part taking actions to assure that things in your life stay the same so that your Box continues to do its job. Conscious Spaceholding begins in Adulthood. It is not about Surviving. Conscious Spaceholding is about Living, empowering other people to Live, and about supporting Conscious-Purpose Gameworlds to thrive.
This means that if your Gremlin is not Transformed, activated, consciously brought to your side as an ally, then your Gremlin will undermine anything other than its standard survival behaviors that automatically return you to your Child Ego State or your Gremlin Ego State.
Once your Gremlin is Transformed - which is a year or two of hard work on a Gremlin Transformation Team with a Gremlin Transformation Coach at your side - then you are prepared to Decontaminate your Adult Ego State from other Ego States, so that you can stabilize yourself in your Adult Ego State and start consciously Holding and Navigating Space.
RECLAIM YOUR AUTHORITY IN ALL DOMAINS
WHO HAS AUTHORITY IN THIS SPACE?
WHOSE SPACE IS IT?
Either in a meeting or in a public talk. You speak about how you have been learning to take your Authority back for owning the space the you're holding. Because so much of Modern Culture the space is owned by the Teacher, the priest, the secretary of the doctor, there are no spaces that are mine. People stay unaware of spaces and think there are no spaces and have no consideration for other people's spaces. When the dog is barking, they think they're not affecting people's spaces, because they think the only held space is the church. The consequence of not holding your own space is to not even consider other people's spaces. Who do you have to take authority back from to own the space that you are in? And then for extra credit, go to one of those people and say "I am taking my authority back to be in the space. So I am going to be in the space and not give you my authority" with the understanding that a Possibilitator lives like that.
RECLAIM YOUR ATTENTION
If you place your expanded “field attention” on the whole of the space you are holding – for example, the entire room you are in with people, or just the two of you at a café table, or even you and the other person not in the same room but in the space of a telephone conversation – and you declare that space as distinct from all other spaces, then you gain the ability to name the Principles that the space itself is called into existence to serve.
Edit to be an experiment.
ACTIVATE YOUR PURPOSE SNIFFER
The easiest way to detect what Principles are at work in an energetic space is to continuously ask yourself the experiential questions, “What is the purpose here? What is really going on here?”
The answer to your questions will be a whole body sensing of the set of Bright or Shadow Principles being fulfilled by what is present or what is happening in that space. This way you will continue to refine your space holding and space navigating skills.
It is like learning to read road signs while you are driving so that you can tell what country you are in: Ordinary Human Relationship, Extraordinary Human Relationship, or Archetypal Relationship.
With your new driving skills and a few maps you can drive wherever you like.
THE REASON IS NOT THE CAUSE. PURPOSE PREVAILS.
Purpose is a quality of a space – such as Possibility, or Drala (Sanskrit for Magical Energy) – which influences what can happen.
The Purpose in a space can be conscious and declared, or unconscious and undeclared.
The Purpose can serve the conscious or unconscious ‘I’ and/or the conscious or unconscious ‘we’.
What happens for you, your family, your partnership, your team, your village, your country, and the world is a manifestation of Purpose. It is possible to learn to create and hold conscious declared Purposes for both the ‘I’ and the ‘we’ in the gameworlds of your life.
Read and do the experiment of SPARK192
DECLARE WHICH PRINCIPLES ARE CALLED INTO A SPACE
Bright Principles are aspects of responsibility.
Shadow Principles are aspects of irresponsibility.
Each space has its own mix of Bright Principles and Shadow Principles. As you create or enter a space it is helpful to know which Principles are at work and which Principles you can call into that space.
SHIFT FROM ORDINARY TO EXTRAORDINARY SPACE
The possibility of holding space lays outside ordinary Western culture and will only become interesting and useful as you develop your space-holding skills.
Note: most times some kind of space is being held somehow. If you are going to hold a space, you are already in a different kind of space. To hold the kind of space that you want to hold, will involve cavitating or shifting out of the current space. Cavitating a new space within or shifting to a newly contexted space.
The experiment is for the next 2 weeks, 3 times a day, when you're in your life, at work or in town, create a space for your BP. Start by scanning or noticing (links) what kind of space currently exists and decide if you will cavitate a space for your BP or if you will shift the space by going sideways through a side door into another space and then do it. 3 times a day for the next 2 weeks, so you develop the skills to cause a space for your Bright Principles anywhere. Standing in line at the butcher shop or talking to your neighbor. Or walking to work. Handling a problem with a client. Develop the skills to cause a space for your Bright Principles no matter where you are. Do it by Cavitating and inhabiting new Space, or Going Nonlinear, thereby shifting into a new space.
PAY RESPECT TO THE PRESIDING DEITY IN THE SPACE
While you proceed from one Space to another Space as part of your work together, then, as you enter a Space, your first action could be to recognize and pay respects to the 'Presiding Deity of the Space'.
The 'Presiding Deity' is the Bright (or Shadow) character concocted out of the Principles that work through that space.
Recognizing and greeting the Presiding Deity of a Space establishes a connection between you as the Space Navigator, and the Deity, in such a way that a profitable exchange can occur, a 'reciprocal feeding', resulting in a flow of blessings for everyone in the space.
More information and practices about this are given at Navigate Space and Archetypal Domains.
What It Means To Hold Space For Someone by Heather Plett
The Transformative Effect of 'Being There' for Others
When my Mom was dying, my siblings and I gathered to be with her in her final days. None of us knew anything about supporting someone in her transition out of this life into the next, but we were pretty sure we wanted to keep her at home, so we did.
While we supported Mom, we were, in turn, supported by a gifted palliative care nurse, Ann, who came every few days to care for Mom and to talk to us about what we could expect in the coming days. She taught us how to inject Mom with morphine when she became restless, she offered to do the difficult tasks (like giving Mom a bath), and she gave us only as much information as we needed about what to do with Mom’s body after her spirit had passed. (continues below)
“Take your time,” she said. “You don’t need to call the funeral home until you’re ready. Gather the people who will want to say their final farewells. Sit with your mom as long as you need to. When you’re ready, call and they will come to pick her up.”
Ann gave us an incredible gift in those final days. Though it was an excruciating week, we knew that we were being held by someone who was only a phone call away.
In the two years since then, I’ve often thought about Ann and the important role she played in our lives. She was much more than what can fit in the title of ‘palliative care nurse.’ She was facilitator, coach, and guide. By offering gentle, nonjudgmental support and guidance, she helped us walk one of the most difficult journeys of our lives.
The work that Ann did can be defined by a term that’s become common in some of the circles in which I work. She was holding space for us.
What Does it Mean to ‘Hold Space’ for Someone Else?
It means that we are willing to walk alongside another person in whatever journey they’re on without judging them, making them feel inadequate, trying to fix them, or trying to impact the outcome. When we hold space for other people, we open our hearts, offer unconditional support, and let go of judgement and control.
Sometimes we find ourselves holding space for people while they hold space for others. In our situation, for example, Ann was holding space for us while we held space for Mom. Though I know nothing about her support system, I suspect that there are others holding space for Ann as she does this challenging and meaningful work. It’s virtually impossible to be a strong space holder unless we have others who will hold space for us. Even the strongest leaders, coaches, nurses, etc., need to know that there are some people with whom they can be vulnerable and weak without fear of being judged.
In my own roles as teacher, facilitator, coach, mother, wife, and friend, etc., I do my best to hold space for other people in the same way that Ann modeled it for me and my siblings. It’s not always easy because I have a very human tendency to want to fix people, give them advice, or judge them for not being further along the path than they are, but I keep trying because I know that it’s important. At the same time, there are people in my life that I trust to hold space for me.
To truly support people in their own growth, transformation, grief, etc., we can’t do it by taking their power away (ie. trying to fix their problems), shaming them (ie. implying that they should know more than they do), or overwhelming them (ie. giving them more information than they’re ready for). We have to be prepared to step to the side so that they can make their own choices, offer them unconditional love and support, give gentle guidance when it’s needed, and make them feel safe even when they make mistakes.
What I Learned about Holding Space for Others
Here are the lessons I’ve learned from Ann and others who have held space for me.
Give people permission to trust their own intuition and wisdom. When we were supporting Mom in her final days, we had no experience to rely on and yet, intuitively, we knew what was needed. We knew how to carry her shrinking body to the washroom, we knew how to sit and sing hymns to her, and we knew how to love her. We even knew when it was time to inject the medication that would help ease her pain. In a very gentle way, Ann let us know that we didn’t need to do things according to some arbitrary health care protocol–we simply needed to trust our intuition and accumulated wisdom from the many years we’d loved Mom.
Give people only as much information as they can handle. Ann gave us some simple instructions and left us with a few handouts, but did not overwhelm us with far more than we could process in our tender time of grief. Too much information would have left us feeling incompetent and unworthy.
Don’t take their power away–empower them instead. When we take decision-making power out of people’s hands, we leave them feeling useless and incompetent. There may be some times when we need to step in and make hard decisions for other people (ie. when they’re dealing with an addiction and an intervention feels like the only thing that will save them), but in almost every other case, people need the autonomy to make their own choices (even our children). Ann knew that we needed to feel empowered in making decisions on our Mom’s behalf, and so she offered support but never tried to direct or control us.
Try to keep your own ego out of it. This is a big one. We all get caught in that trap now and then–when we begin to believe that someone else’s success is dependent on our intervention, or when we think that their failure reflects poorly on us, or when we’re convinced that whatever emotions they choose to unload on us are about us instead of them. It’s a trap I’ve occasionally found myself slipping into when I teach. I can become more concerned about my own success (Do the students like me? Do their marks reflect on my ability to teach? Etc.) than about the success of my students. But that doesn’t serve anyone–not even me. To truly support their growth, I need to keep my ego out of it and create the space where they have the opportunity to grow and learn.
Make them feel safe enough to fail. When people are learning, growing, or going through grief or transition, they are bound to make some mistakes along the way. When we, as their space holders, withhold judgement and shame, we offer them the opportunity to reach inside themselves to find the courage to take risks and the resilience to keep going even when they fail. When we let them know that failure is simply a part of the journey and not the end of the world, they’ll spend less time beating themselves up for it and more time learning from their mistakes.
Give guidance and help with humility and thoughtfulness. A wise space holder knows when to withhold guidance (ie. when it makes a person feel foolish and inadequate) and when to offer it gently (ie. when a person asks for it or is too lost to know what to ask for). Though Ann did not take our power or autonomy away, she did offer to come and give Mom baths and do some of the more challenging parts of caregiving. This was a relief to us, as we had no practice at it and didn’t want to place Mom in a position that might make her feel shame (ie. having her children see her naked). This is a careful dance that we all must do when we hold space for other people. Recognizing the areas in which they feel most vulnerable and incapable and offering the right kind of help without shaming them takes practice and humility.
Create a container for complex emotions, fear, trauma, etc. When people feel that they are held in a deeper way than they are used to, they feel safe enough to allow complex emotions to surface that might normally remain hidden. Someone who is practiced at holding space knows that this can happen and will be prepared to hold it in a gentle, supportive, and nonjudgmental way. In The Circle Way, we talk about “holding the rim” for people.
The circle becomes the space where people feel safe enough to fall apart without fearing that this will leave them permanently broken or that they will be shamed by others in the room. Someone is always there to offer strength and courage. This is not easy work, and it is work that I continue to learn about as I host increasingly more challenging conversations. We cannot do it if we are overly emotional ourselves, if we haven’t done the hard work of looking into our own shadow, or if we don’t trust the people we are holding space for. In Ann’s case, she did this by showing up with tenderness, compassion, and confidence. If she had shown up in a way that didn’t offer us the assurance that she could handle difficult situations or that she was afraid of death, we wouldn’t have been able to trust her as we did.
Allow them to make different decisions and to have different experiences than you would. Holding space is about respecting each person’s differences and recognising that those differences may lead to them making choices that we would not make. Sometimes, for example, they make choices based on cultural norms that we can’t understand from within our own experience. When we hold space, we release control and we honour differences. This showed up, for example, in the way that Ann supported us in making decisions about what to do with Mom’s body after her spirit was no longer housed there. If there had been some ritual that we felt we needed to conduct before releasing her body, we were free to do that in the privacy of Mom’s home.
Holding space is not something that we can master overnight, or that can be adequately addressed in a list of tips like the ones I’ve just offered. It’s a complex practice that evolves as we practice it, and it is unique to each person and each situation.
HOLDING SPACE IN ONLINE MEETINGS
Being a Spaceholder of an online meeting or Possibility Coaching Process does not mean showing up for a one-and-a-half-hour call, saying "Hello," and proposing an exercise.
Being a Spaceholder for an online Space is letting the Context of the space 'eat' you so that what you think you know or what you think you are is undermined by the larger Context of, in this case, Radical Responsibility.For example, if you ask for a Spaceholder to replace you at the next meeting on the day before the weekly call, any person who thinks about volunteering has only one day to let themselves be worked on by the Space. Most likely their Box and Gremlin will protect them from being worked on by the Context.
When no one volunteers for the Spaceholding job at the meeting, then for six days, the Context of the Space is not being held. This can happen if no one has Shifted Identity into being a Spaceholder. When you are a Spaceholder, the Context of the Space ongoingly works on you, day and night, whether or not you have put your hand up to 'officially' Hold Space.The Proposal is this: at the end of each meeting, ask who will Commit to being the next Spaceholder. By rotating Spaceholder, you give each person in the Team - including you - the chance to be worked on by the Context.
On the other hand, if no one volunteers to be next week's Spaceholder, one of two conditions may be arising:
- It is actually YOUR meeting Space, and you are the 'permanent' Spaceholder. Perhaps you have been Denying this to yourself and others for one Reason or another. In this case, it can help to clearly Declare that this is your Space for doing the kinds of Experiments you need to explore and discover now. If you feel fear about making this Declaration, then use this Emotion as a Doorway to one or more Emotional Healing Processes (EHP). discover what is really going on, remove the Energetic Blocks, make new Decisions, etc., and create a new future for yourself.
- If no one wants to 'sacrifice 'the Ordinary' and serve the Purpose of the Space as the Spaceholder, then why are you having this meeting? The Necessity of the meeting may have already been served. The Possibility of the meeting Space may be over, and the Space should be formally killed, consciously, rather than letting it die out in a slow and disrespectful agony, starvation from lack of Love. That would be sloppy Spaceholding.
Experiments
NOTICE ENERGETIC SPACE
Matrix Code HOLDSPAC.01
Do this experiment for 3 days, and extend it one whole day if you forget that you are doing an Experiment on any of the 3 days. This Experiment is to Notice every Energetic Space that you move in and out of.
A hint is that most Energetic spaces are inside of clearly defined Physical Spaces. For example, commonly the Energetic Space of your bedroom is delimited by the walls and door of your bedroom. This means when you go through a physical doorway, you often also go through an Energetic Doorway, into a new Energetic Space.
As you go in and out of Spaces, tell yourself: "This is the Energetic Space for the kitchen. This is the Energetic Space of the driveway. This is the Energetic Space of the sidewalk."
Notice the protocol of each Energetic Space, the 'Rules Of Engagement' for that Space. Notice: What is allowed? What is not allowed? How does this space go?
For example, in the energetic space of the sidewalk, notice which side are you walking on? Does this depend on which country the sidewalk is in? How fast or slow can you walk without being weird? How close or far away from others is appropriate? What do you do when somebody bumps into you and you are missing your wallet afterwards?
Each Energetic Space is clearly delimited and has precise protocols which impacts you whether you are aware of them or not. As Robert A. Heinlein says in his book Glory Road (Matrix Code BOOK0229.00): "The world is what it is, and does not forgive ignorance." This Experiment is to grow that Energetic Space Protocols.
For 5 minutes during each day, film yourself moving from Energetic Space to Energetic Space, each time naming out loud the Energetic Space that you are entering as well as some of the protocols. For example: “I am now entering the kitchen Space. This is the counter and I am not allowed to leave crumbs or drips on it.”Post the video on YouTube or Vimeo and enter the link as a Proof when you register Matrix Code HOLDSPAC.01 in your free account at StartOver.xyz. This Experiment is worth 1 Matrix Point.
CREATE ENERGETIC SPACE WITH YOUR CLICKER
Matrix Code HOLDSPAC.02
Your 'Clicker' is one of your 13 Tools on your Possibilitator Toolbelt. Your Clicker is an aid to making Declarations with your Energetic Body.
For one entire week, use your Clicker out loud to Declare the eight points of each corner of the Energetic Spaces that you are Holding. This 8 points establish an energetic cube on the corners of the space. Do this for as many Energetic Spaces as you can. Each time you Declare each of the 8 points of the Energetic cube around the Space, you Declare that you are consciously holding the space. Notice what changes.
- Declare the space in the toilet stall.
- Declare the space of your meeting just before it starts.
- Declare your space of writing before you sit down to write a letter or a note.
- Declare the space of homework.
- Declare the energetic space of intimacy before you have a conversation with your partner.
- Declare the space of website creation before you update your website. And so on...
You can Hold Energetic Space for interactions and Possibilities in a multitude of conditions, for example: sitting safely alone on the bus, having a conversation with your mom on the phone, buying your groceries, etc. You can even create an Energetic Space that spans halfway across the globe if you are in a video call.
As a proof for your Experiment, write a short paragraph about the most extraordinary 8 points you have ever clicked.
After completing this Experiment for one week and written your paragraph, please register your Matrix Code HOLDSPAC.02 in your free account at StartOver.xyz. This Experiment is worth 1 Matrix Point.
SET THE PURPOSE OF EACH ENERGETIC SPACE
Matrix Code HOLDSPAC.03
For each space you are in you follow a particular purpose and the point of this experiment is to make that purpose conscious.
For one day (or 3 if you forget about the experiment on the first day), each time you have a conversation with someone, at work, at home, on the phone or standing in line, start the conversation after greetings with "my purpose for this meeting space is...", or "what I would like to create in this space is...", or "while we have this space together, my purpose is...". Use the word “space” to respect the space and remind yourself that a conversation is an energetic space. For example, you can start a conversation with your colleague over the water dispenser by saying “my purpose for this conversation is to get to know you better as a human being and not just a work colleague.”
Notice how it is to take responsibility for the space by consciously declaring its purpose and how it transforms how the space usually goes. Does it make it faster? Longer? More tense or relaxed? Safer or more dangerous? Does the other person join you in the space? Do they have competing purposes?
Secret: Your purpose is revealed by the result that you create. You have parts and they each have different purposes. You might think that you have a purpose but if the results are different than what you originally thought, then that was not your true purpose.
For example, you might want to go back to your colleague and say “actually my true purpose back then was to waste as much time as I could before getting back to work, and now my purpose for the space is to be radically honest.”
After you have completed this experiment for 1 (or 3 days), please register your Matrix Code HOLDSPAC.03 in your free account at StartOver.xyz. This experiment is worth 1 Matrix Point.GO THROUGH DOORWAYS FROM SPACE TO SPACE
Matrix Code HOLDSPAC.04
Each time you go through a doorway, remember you are leaving one space behind and entering an entirely new space. It is common that you fall asleep when shifting from one space to another. The point of this experiment is to use the experience of going through a physical doorway to wake up instead of falling asleep.
For 5 days, practice consciously going through doorways. For example, you can put up stickers on each of your door frames and touch it every time you go through the door, or each time you go through a doorway do it in slow-motion as if your body was sliding through the spaces. It might help to wear a physical reminder like a ring, bracelet or wristband for the duration of the experiment.
When you forget, you are asleep, and when you catch yourself asleep, do 5 jumping jacks immediately, center yourself, or put your hands in the air and declare out loud that “this is a space!”. When you go through the door, sense with your 5 bodies, your intuition, your Archetypal Lineage, your Bright Principles, your Purpose Sniffer, your Bullshit Detector, your Low Drama, your Gremlin Detector, etc... the different qualities of space.
Notice also what makes you forget or not “see” the doorways. For example, it might be a particular set of unconscious linear actions from your box like having a meal in the study room, walking in the hallway towards the kitchen to put the plate in the sink, back to the hallway, into the bathroom to wash your hands and back to the study room.
After you have completed this experiment for 5 days, please register the Matrix Code HOLDSPAC.04 in your free account at StartOver.xyz. This experiment is worth 1 Matrix Point.
SPLIT YOUR ATTENTION TO HOLD SPACE
Matrix Code HOLDSPAC.05
An energetic space is multidimensional. Improving your spaceholding is sharpening your ability to hold space for dimensions that you can already distinguish, and learning to hold space for dimensions that you did not know existed.
You can hold more than one dimension in your awareness when you can split your attention consciously. It makes splitting your attention an indispensable skill for holding space.
You can already split your attention unconsciously because you can probably ride a bike, listen to music in headphones, look at store window, breath and think about your shopping list all at the same time. Now it is time to practice splitting your attention consciously.The experiment is for 1 week, at least once a day for 5 minutes split your attention consciously by focusing:
- First on a physical object: a cup, your watch, a flower
- Then split your attention to the conversation happening in the space
- Then split your attention a third way by moving a part of your physical body (rotate your feet, tap your finger, etc...)
- Then if you can, split your attention a fourth way by making the already happening conversation transformational.
Hint: put an alarm for every day of the week at the same time as a reminder.
Notice what happens in the spaces in which your split your attention. What happens? What becomes possible that was not before?
Proof: Write a short paragraph about the amazingness of learning to split your attention consciously and send it to your Possibility Team or any other group with whom you are on a path of Evolution. Spread the secret!
After you have completed this experiment for one week, please register the Matrix Code HOLDSPAC.05 in your free account at StartOver.xyz. This experiment is worth 1 Matrix Point.
LEARN TO HOLD TRIPLE SPACE
Matrix Code HOLDSPAC.06
You have previously experimented with consciously noticing and creating one space. Now you go one step further and experiment with simultaneously noticing and holding three spaces.
Your personal Bubble Of Space
Your Work Space with your client or with anybody, that you currently are in interaction with
The overall space you are in. This can be the Training Space, the restaurant, your house, your neighborhood, your village, your town etc. (this is to be chosen by you).
If you have already completed HOLDSPAC.04 you will be aware of the challenge to stay awake when leaving one space and not being aware of the doorway - and thus missing the opportunity of centering.
The experiment:
Consciously notice any change of a Physical Space (room in your apartment/house, go inside / outside, location in town, elevator, car, public transport, forest, …) or virtual & energetic space (Zoom-conference, conversation, …)
At the transition-point declare these three spaces with its main qualities (feelings/emotions, authority, ordinary/extraordinary, bright principles, purpose, speed, spaceholder(s), playworld, …)
You might use three fingers of your non-dominant hand to embody the act of declaring each of the three spaces (e.g. by pressing the thumb on the respective finger).
There might be situations, when a change of space might not allow an immediate inner scan at the transition-point. Do it in the first possible moment after. Declaring Spaces does not have to be a big ritual. It can be made in less than 30 seconds.
Do this Experiment for three days in a row. Every time you skip the declaration, make a little drawing or painting of the Space that you skipped including the people in it (on approximately A6 format) and send a photo of it to your Possibility Team.
After you have completed this experiment for 3 days, please register the Matrix Code HOLDSPAC.06 in your free account at StartOver.xyz. This experiment is worth 1 Matrix Point.
HOLDING SPACE FOR GAIA
Matrix Code HOLDSPAC.07
You can go through and hold space for this experiment in your Possibility Team. When you hold space for this experiment, you also go through the experiment. Therefore, you do not have to have been through the experiment before your hold space
For this experiment, make for yourself an undisturbed space for 45 minutes.
The experiential experiment goes like this:
- Sit comfortably in a chair. Make sure that you are centered, by finding your center with your attention, and with your intention move it to your physical center. You are now centered.
- Use your clicker to declare your grounding cord and your personal bubble.
- Use your clicker to declare 8 points in the corners of the physical space that you are in: the first 4 on the bottom corners, and then 4 on top four corners of the room. Use your clicker for each of the 8 points. If you 'lose' the declared energetic space, click it again. You can do it with just one click.
- Use your clicker to shrink the space around the chair and you.
- Use your clicker to extend the space to the entire physical space.
- Use your clicker to shrink the space back to the chair and you. Do you realize how easy that is?
- Use your clicker to extend the space to the physical space.
- Use your clicker to shrink the space to you and the chair.
- Use your clicker to extend the space to the physical.
- Use your clicker to extend the space to the whole house or building around you. You are holding space now for the whole building, although you don’t know what is in there. You take energetic responsibility
- Use your clicker to extend the space to 10 m around the house of building.
- Use your clicker to extend the space to include the city or village where you are. Now you are holding space with your attention and intention for hundreds of hectare of land, birds, people.
- Use your clicker to extend the space to the entire region / state that you are in. You now hold space for a million people. A lot of stuff is happening right now there. You take responsibility for this space.
- Use your clicker to extend the space to the entire country that you are in. That country is not square, but with 8 points you can still hold space. You are now holding space for million people.
- Use your clicker to extend to the entire continent that you are in.
- Use your clicker to extend to the entire Planet Earth (almost 8 billion people). As you are holding space for the entire Planet Earth, call in the Bright Principle of Respect.
- Use your clicker to extend the space that you are holding to the entire solar system with all 9 planets. Look how small the Earth is.
- Use your clicker to extend the space that you are holding to the entire milky way
- Use your clicker to extend the space that you are holding to the entire galaxy with 800 billion stars and unlimited space.
- Use your clicker to extend the space that you are holding to all galaxies in this Universe. You are holding space for the entire universe now
- Use your clicker to extend the space that you are holding to all universes. Now you are holding space for all universes.
- Now shortly open your eyes and keep holding space while putting your attention on all universes.
- Now close your eyes again.
- Then use your clicker to shrink the space gradually - each step from all Universes to you and your chair. Do you realize how easy it is to hold space for the Milky Way compared to all Universes?
- When you are back to holding space for you and your chair, take a deep breath and open your eyes.
After you have completed the experiment, please register the Matrix Code HOLDSPAC.07 in your free account at StartOver.xyz. This experiment is worth 1 Matrix Point.
THE SPACE DETERMINES WHAT IS POSSIBLE: GO FIREWALKING
Matrix Code HOLDSPAC.08
The space determines what is possible. This is a completly (r)evolutionary experiential distinction. You probably have had the experience in the past that some things you could do in one energetic space, you could not do in another.
For example, if you might be able to share your feelings and inner states in a private conversation with your partner, you might not as it is be able to be as vulnerable in your next work meeting about this year's finances. The difference is not your ability to be vulnerable, but the quality, dimension, context, purpose, direction, ... of the spaces. The space determines what is possible.
In a radically responsible context, this is great news! This means that you can no longer be a victim of what is possible or not in a space. If something is not possible in the space, change the space.
The experiment to experience the clarity of 'the space determines what is possible' experientially in your five bodies is to go through the Initiation Process of Fire Walking.
This week organize yourself and book a Fire Walking process happening in the next 6 months. We recommend two spaceholders who use Possibility Management distinctions to hold space for the Fire Walking and with whom we have had only extraordinary experiences:
- Michael Halling: https://www.aufbruch-trainings.de/feuerlauf/
- Arthur Dorsch: https://innernature.de/
After you have completed the experiment, which means actually been through a Fire Walking experience, please register the Matrix Code HOLDSPAC.08 in your free account at StartOver.xyz. This experiment is worth 5 Matrix Points.
DETECT AND PRACTICE BRUTAL WAYS TO DESTROY SPACES
Matrix Code HOLDSPAC.09
As you are becoming more and more aware of each energetic space that you move in and out of, and that each space determines what is possible. The next step is improving your spaceholding skill is to be able to change, morph, transform or move from one space to another space.
Elegantly moving from one space to the next requires first that you are able to destroy spaces at will. When you can destroy spaces consciously, you never have to be a victim of the current space. Practicing destroying space in brutal ways also allows you to sense the experience of when a space is 'killed'. You will be able to notice more easily when other unconsciously 'kill' spaces that are dangerous for their Box or Gremlin. Then you do not have to be a victim of Box and Gremlin trying to defend themselves at your expense either.
For this experiment, start by making a list in your Beep! Book at least 20 ways to destroy an energetic space brutally. For example, by making a loud sound or start dancing gopak (russian dance) or singing a Broadway Tune.
WARNING: The point here is NOT shock or frightened people, so we are not talking about shouting in their ears or coming out from the shadow and jumping on them. These are unconscious Gremlin technologies that serve unconscious Gremlin Purpose.
Choose 7 to 10 of these brutal technologies to destroy space and implement at least one each day for next 7 days.
Notice if you are capable of destroying the previous space completely or not. Why? Or why not? Take notes of what works and what does not work to 'kill' one space before moving into the next one.Write a short 1-page article of your research from your notes, and send the link to the StartOver.xyz Team in the proof section when you are registering your Matrix Point.
After you have completed the experiment, please register the Matrix Code HOLDSPAC.09 in your free account at StartOver.xyz. This experiment is worth 1 Matrix Point.
PS: For clarity, Transformational Proposals are not limited to brutal technologies to destroy space, YET, brutal technologies to destroy Spaces are often Transformational Proposals.
DETECT AND PRACTICE SUBTLE WAYS TO DESTROY SPACES
Matrix Code HOLDSPAC.10
After practicing brutal ways to destroy a space before shifting to the next energetic space, now the experiment is to detect and practice subtle and more elegant ways to destroy an energetic space before moving on the next.
This does not mean that brutal ways are to be forgotten after you discover the subtle ways to destroy spaces. Both are useful depending on what is needed and wanted.
Subtle technologies to destroy spaces are subtle because they are undetectable for most people around you. They cannot and do not notice how you shape, destroy, create, morph the space ongoingly.
For this experiment, start by making a list in your Beep! Book at least 20 ways to destroy an energetic space subtly. For example, make an adult or archetypal offer for intimacy, energetically lean on the side of the space and ask your Gremlin to grab on to a difference space then pull on that new space while being in connection with everyone in the space, or a even a simple sigh.
Choose 7 to 10 of these subtle technologies to destroy space and implement at least one each day for next 7 days.
Notice if you are capable of destroring the previous space completly or not. Why? Why not? Take notes of what works and what does not work to 'kill' one space before moving into the next one. Notice also the different between the brutal technologies and the subtle technologies.Write a short 1-page article of your research from your notes, and send the link to the StartOver.xyz Team in the proof section when you are registering your Matrix Point.
After you have completed the experiment, please register the Matrix Code HOLDSPAC.10 in your free account at StartOver.xyz. This experiment is worth 1 Matrix Point.
SLIDE SIDEWAYS BETWEEN THE GAPS IN SPACE
Matrix Code HOLDSPAC.11
This is a day-long experiment, or 3-day if you forget about the experiment on the first day. For this entire day, your experiment is that each time you find yourself in a physical doorway, stop. Lean back and forth between the space behind and the space in front of you.
The space in between these two spaces is the gap in space. When there is a door frame, it is the space 'inside' the doorframe.
There is also a gap in space between two energetical spaces which co-exist in the same physical space. The gap only need to be paper thin for it to exist.
Experience leaning back and forth between the spaces and the gap in space, like between the bathroom and the corridor, or the hallway and your bedroom, or the street and the café. Do this inside of your home and the outside. Notice the experience of being in a gap in space.
Each space has a different set of possibilities (the space determines what is possible). In the gap in the space, you are liberated from all restraints on the possibilities available to you. You have freedom of movement. You have choice. You can go anywhere from here. Wonderful! Is it really?
Notice the fears that emerges from having access to that amount of liberty when you consciously linger in the gap in space. What are your fears about? Write them down in your Beep! Book. They are most probably gateway for Emotional Healing Processes.
After you have completed the experiment, please register the Matrix Code HOLDSPAC.11 in your free account at StartOver.xyz. This experiment is worth 1 Matrix Point.
IMPLEMENT NEW DISTINCTIONS IN A SPACE
Matrix Code HOLDSPAC.12
Each space has its own context (level of awareness and responsibility), rules of engagement, purpose, direction, speed, and quality.
The context of a space determines the content of the space - what is possible. The context of a space is the relationship of the space to responsibility and consciousness. The distinctions used and apply in the space emerges out of the context. But, change the distinctions used and apply in the space, and all of a sudden the context changes. The relationship between the context and the distinctions is an ongoing feedback mechanisms.
The experiment is once a day for the next week to, in a consciously choosen energetic space, add and implement one new distinction that was not applied in the space before so that extraordinary new options become possible for the people in the space.
A distinction is an energetic declaration that experientially differentiate (without separating) between one thing and another thing. A new distinction created the ability to distinguish things that were beforehand undistinguishable.
Doing this experiment, you might freak out some of the people's Box in the space. Keep your center, and your authority and go on with the experiment. Notice and write down in your Beep! Book of the most elegant and efficient ways to add and implement new distinctions in an energetic space.
'Landing' new distinction in a space is Possibilitator and Trainer skills. It is a necessary skill to shift from an ordinary space to an extraordinary space.
After you have completed the experiment, please register the Matrix Code HOLDSPAC.12 in your free account at StartOver.xyz. This experiment is worth 1 Matrix Point.
DETECT YOUR PURPOSES FOR NON-COMMITTMENT
Matrix Code HOLDSPAC.13
This is an experiment that is valuable to do in your Possibility Team. If you do not have your Possibility Team, arrange to meet (offline or online) with someone who can interview your Gremlin.
Arrange to meet for 20 minutes, or double that time if you both want to do this experiment with each other, changing roles midway through the set time.
Please have your Beep! Book and pen ready for the interview.
The interviewer asks you the following questions, giving time for your Gremlin to answer each question in between.
"I want to interview your Gremlin. I have a few questions I want to ask your Gremlin.
- Right now, Gremlin, what are you really up to here in this space? (Give the Gremlin about 3-4 minutes to answer) If the Gremlin gives bullshit Gremlin answer, refuse to be hooked and believe them. Keep asking the real question demanding a real answer.
- Which Gremlin benefit from being in the space that have nothing to do in the space?
- How can you eat this space?
- How can you destroy this space?
- How can you conquer the space?
- How can you make me - the spaceholder - look crazy or make me look bad?"
The answers to these questions are your unconscious noncommital purposes to the space.
After you have completed the experiment, please register the Matrix Code HOLDSPAC.13 in your free account at StartOver.xyz. This experiment is worth 1 Matrix Point.
USE METACONVERSATION TO ESTABLISH A HELD SPACE
Matrix Code HOLDSPAC.14
This is about taking Radical Responsibility and Authority for Holding a Space where the Space was not Held before.
I think I would like to be in a Held Space.
I wonder who is Holding this Space.
If this were a Held Space we could agree on our shared Purpose.
etc.
The Context of the Space determines the content, what is possible in the space. The context itself is determined by the Distinctions at work in the Space. Implement Distinctions that have never been implemented before so that extraordinarily beneficial thing are possible in this space. Write down in your Beep! Book which Distinction you implement and what could be created then.
After you have completed the experiment, please register the Matrix Code HOLDSPAC.14 in your free account at StartOver.xyz. This experiment is worth 1 Matrix Point.
TAKE AUTHORITY IN EACH SPACE
Matrix Code HOLDSPAC.15
After you have completed the experiment, please register the Matrix Code HOLDSPAC.15 in your free account at StartOver.xyz. This experiment is worth 1 Matrix Point.
NOTICE WHAT GREMLINS ARE DOING IN THE SPACE
Matrix Code HOLDSPAC.16
After you have completed the experiment, please register the Matrix Code HOLDSPAC.16 in your free account at StartOver.xyz. This experiment is worth 1 Matrix Point.
HOLD ORDINARY SPACES ON PURPOSE
Matrix Code HOLDSPAC.17
After you have completed the experiment, please register the Matrix Code HOLDSPAC.17 in your free account at StartOver.xyz. This experiment is worth 1 Matrix Point.
DETECT AND PRACTICE TRANSFORMING ORDINARY HELD SPACE INTO EXTRAORDINARY HELD SPACE
Matrix Code HOLDSPAC.18
After you have completed the experiment, please register the Matrix Code HOLDSPAC.18 in your free account at StartOver.xyz.
This experiment is worth 1 Matrix Point.
WRITE AND PUBLISH AN ARTICLE ABOUT HOLDING EXTRAORDINARY SPACE
Matrix Code HOLDSPAC.19
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GIVE A WORKTALK ABOUT HOLDING SWORD AND CHOCOLATE SPACE
Matrix Code HOLDSPAC.20
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DETECT AND PRACTICE CREATING ARCHETYPAL SPACES
Matrix Code HOLDSPAC.21
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PIRATE A SPACE
Matrix Code HOLDSPAC.22
During a Possibility Team, have a conscious struggle to own the space. One person stands up and starts giving a talk. Somebody in the audience, does whatever it takes to take over the space and then give their talk until someone takes it over next. Remember: don't hurt yourself, and don't hurt others.
The rest of the Team should pay attention to notice the shift of spaceholder. When this happens, the Team raise their hands.
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INVENT ENTIRELY NEW SPACES
Matrix Code HOLDSPAC.23
Set your Conscious Purpose to establish an exceptionally useful and interesting High Level Fun Invention Space.
You may end up doing Discover Speaking in that Space.
Since the context of the space determine the content, meaning what is possible in the space, and, the distinction of the space determines the context of the space. Implement distinctions that have never been implemented before so that extraordinarily beneficial thing are possible in this space. Write down in your Beep! Book which distinction you implement and what could be created then.
Go through a Nonlinear Doorway and bring everyone with you.
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DETECT AND PRACTICE MAKING OFFERS TO CREATE A PARTICULAR SPACE
Matrix Code HOLDSPAC.24
Every offer you make sets the context for the space.
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NOTE: This website is a Bubble in the Bubble Map of the free-to-play massively-multiplayer online-and-offline thoughtware-upgrade matrix-building personal-transformation real-life adventure-game called StartOver.xyz. It is a doorway to experiments that upgrade your thoughtware so you can relocate your point of origin and create more possibility. Your knowledge is what you think about. Your thoughtware is what you use to think with. When you change your thoughtware, you go through a liquid state as your mind reorganizes itself. Liquid states can bring up transformational feelings and emotions. By upgrading your thoughtware you build matrix to hold more consciousness and leave behind a low drama life of reactivity. No one can upgrade your thoughtware for you. More interestingly, no one can stop you from upgrading your thoughtware. Our theory is that when we collectively build 1,000,000 new Matrix Points we will change the morphogenetic field of the human race for the better. Please choose responsibly to read this website. Reading this whole website is worth 1 Matrix Point. Doing any of the experiments earns you additional Matrix Points. Please use Matrix Code HOLDSPAC.00 to log your Matrix Point for reading this website on StartOver.xyz. Thank you for playing full out!